Taking Life Seriously

-4-

Dean, the Great Gewain, Peabody was sitting on the Savemore loading bay steps and looking up at the sky. The sky was unusually dark for November. Anita handed him the joint.

'I mean, it's weird right? They kinda look like pancakes.' said Dean.

'Yes, they do a bit,' said Anita. 'Hey, are they still making those pancakes in the food court? Maybe we should go get some.'

'I'm serious, I have a bad feeling about this.' said Martin.

Dean passed Rajesh the joint.

'Oh come on, Martin, they're only clouds,' said Anita.

'I've never in all my life seen clouds like that.' said Martin.

'I saw something like this once,' said Rajesh.

'Rubbish.' said Martin.

'I did. In Ecuador, next to a volcano. The clouds look flat next to a big mountain. You can be standing right there and you'd never know there's a mountain there at all because the clouds cover it up.'

'Only there's no mountain for miles, is there?' said Martin.

'Look, I'm just saying it's possible for clouds to look like this. That's all.'

'They look like big omlettes, right?' said Dean. 'Fuck,I'm hungry.'

Rajesh passed Martin the joint. The four of them stared at the sky.

Dylan burst through the loading bay doors like a domestic cat that had been set on fire by a neighborhood kid. 'That unbelievable bastard!'

'Jesus Christ the savior. Do not do that again, you scared the hell out of me. I thought you were Rogers.' said Martin, who was now standing up with a clipboard in his hands.

'What did you do with the joint?' said Dean. He was standing up now and looked like he had been disturbed in the middle of unloading. Anita looked like she was taking stock and Rajesh was scrutinizing the content of an already opened box of lampshades. Of the four, Rajesh wore his Savemore uniform best. It was meticulously ironed and the name tag sparkled. Anita and Dean both looked like their uniforms had been washed in starch (a result of the uniforms not being washed at all, ever) and Martin's uniform looked like it was a size too small.

'I dropped it. I already have a citation for drinking too many coffees I really don't need another one, thank you very much.'

'Ah shit,' said Dean. 'well, where is it?'

'I don't know, I wasn't thinking straight, I thought he was Rogers.'

'Hang on, Rogers gave you a citation for drinking too many coffees?' asked Dean.

'Yes. He said three were the allowed number and anything over was theft.'

'That is unbelievable.' said Dean.

'Never mind all that now,' said Dylan, 'Gordon is quitting The Pack.'

'What?' said Anita, Dean and Rajesh together.

'He's fucking quitting. The week before the Center Continent tournament. Can you believe this?'

'He can't quit now,' said Martin, 'we don't qualify without a wizard.'

'Is it because Morpheus kicked him in the balls?' said Rajesh.

Dylan looked at Rajesh and raised one eyebrow. Then he said, 'No, it's that bitch Denise. She told him we're holding him back. Martin, why is your ponytail smoking?'

Martin beat at his hair until the joint fell out. It fell on the ground. He picked it up and took a hit. He offered it to Dylan. Dylan took the roach, crumpled it up and threw it up onto the loading bay roof.

'Concentrate!' he said.

'I will talk to him,' said Rajesh. 'he is obviously confused.'

'No I tried that already,' said Dylan.'I think we'll have to resort to something drastic.'

'Like what?' asked Anita.

'I don't know. Sabotage his coffee breaks? send him nasty notes? What?' said Dylan.

'Well, maybe we kidnap Denise and hold her ransom until the tournament.' said Rajesh.

Everyone turned to look at him. Dean was shaking his head.

After a moment's silence Rajesh said 'Too much?'

'Much too much.' Martin said.

'Seriously, what are we going to do? We can't do the tournament without him, he's our leader.' said Anita.

'I could be the leader,' said Dean.

Anita took Dean's hand and patted it. 'Sure you can, baby.'

Dylan sat down on the loading bay steps and put his face in his hands. 'I can't believe what a bastard he's being. I just can't believe it.'

'Dylan are you crying?' asked Anita. She kneeled down beside him.

Dylan looked up with tears in his eyes and said, 'no, it's just these allergies'

'So Gay.' said Rajesh.

'Shut up Rajesh!' said Anita, 'we'll work it out Dylan.'

'So mean...' said Dylan.

'Well, if I watch anymore of this I'm going to be sick,' said Rajesh.

'Yes, pull yourself together, man.' said Martin. 'Lets go talk some sense into him.'

'You guys go, I just want to be alone for a bit.' said Dylan. He wiped a tear from his eye. Then he said, 'woe guys, have you seen these clouds?'